Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Don't know much...

i'm not sure what to write today; I just feel the need to write. Autumn is finally blowing into town, bringing with it a drastic barometric plunge and blustery winds. Along with the wind, the personalities of my students have blown into the dust. Back to harsh tones and rude comments to each other. Where did our form go? More practice.

The date is drawing near when my family's fate is more officially sealed. I meet with the powers that be next Tuesday and explain my plans and trudge through all the muddy emotions that will make the next 6 weeks almost unbearable. Despite their lapse in manners, my students have become very dear to me. I harbor tremendous guilt either way, but I have to come down on the side of my family and my need to be an effective wife and mother, especially in this time of transition. My own family has got to come first.

On the brighter side of things, our prospects are looking more promising than we originally thought. The possibility of staying in East Pete are slim to none, but potential roosts include: Rochester, NY; Lewiston, Maine; Ashville, NC, Tuscon, AZ, a few spots in Virginia. Some of them may be a real blessing, especially Rochester, which is, after all, the setting of my masterpiece YA! Think of the added research possiblities for my next one!

Ok--bearing up. Ready to face it. (I think I can...I think I can...)

Monday, October 08, 2007

Waiting for a Storm--of Good News...

You know the saying, "When it rains, it pours..." Well it poured all over me this weekend. Bad news, that is. Not about the book, but about virutually everything else. Suffice it to say, our world could be changing dramatically over the next 7 months or so. I don't want to get into details here, but that change could include a move to a new city, though I am hoping that does not happen.

When I got the worst of the news, it was a very strange feeling. What I would imagine it is like when you are free-falling after jumping out of an airplane: hovering weightless over the clouds, all the breath snatched away from you for a moment, but no pain. Just being. Though this could be devastating, I think the change that is about to happen could be a very good thing, and I'm going to believe in that. It's really the only thing to do.

So, I know that I will not be teaching next year. I'm hoping that my book will be in the process of publication by fall. I'm praying that we will find our way to an excitingly good situation. I know this mess will all blow over, but I'm ready for a storm of good news to balance the typhoon of bad news we just encountered over the weekend.

There is no wisdom in this post, just endless hope.

Let it rain...